Friday, February 22, 2019

Phish line @Bonnaroo: Shark vs. Walrus

Posted by teibs On June - 20 - 2009

shark@ZackTeibloom I cheered harder for an inflatable shark than I did for any band all weekend. Weird things happen when a mob forms to see Phish. I’ll start at the beginning.

To get into the front section (let’s call it the glory hole) of the main stage at Bonnaroo, you had to wait in a line as the show before it was going on. It was typically worth the wait, as you’d end up in the best spot, right behind the photo pit.

Bonnaroo closed with Erykah Badu, Snoop and Phish on the main stage, so I planned on staying in the glory hole all night. Unfortunately, they clear the hole out after every show and you have to get back in line. I found Jordan at the end of Badu and we got in the left line (since most people only knew about the right line.)

Since Phish was such a big draw, the Phish line started simultaneously as the Snoop line. We had enough time to get food in shifts and for Erica to go 30 minutes each way to her tent for a bottle of Rum and to get through security even before Snoop came on.

We were about 60 people back with three people across. When Snoop finally did come on, all bets were off. The crowd swelled around the line and it became impossible to tell where the line started and ended. The only way you could tell who was in line for Phish was that when Snoop tried to rile the crowd up, the Phish line crew didn’t react.

When Snoop wound down his set, the Phish line went nuts. Anyone in the vicinity made a push for the front as one security guard let Phish fans in one at a time. “I don’t need a sense of balance anymore” someone yelled out as we were packed so tight, it would be imposible to fall down.

That’s when the inflatable shark and the walrus came out. The shark had “Fluffhead,” “Farmhouse,” “Limb by Limb” and a few other Phish songs written on it and the walrus was just, well, a “pussy ass walrus” as Jordan described it in a text a few days later when I asked what it was that we hated. For some reason I can’t explain, the 200-300 people in the line split into two camps.

One camp loved the shark, one loved the walrus. We were happily in the shark camp and chanted “Shark! Shark! Shark! Shark!” like our lives depended on it before turning the cheer into “Make them fight! Make them fight!” It went on for minutes as the shark and walrus’ owners moved them closer and closer and made them battle. I may be bias, but the Shark made that Walrus his bi*** even though the Walrus made it in the glory hole first.

The bottle neck created to get into the glory hole was like what would happen if Shaq and one of the Olson twins ever hooked up. Yeah, I went there. We finally made it in and lordy, lordy it was good. Every week is shark week.

2 Responses

  1. Walrus Owner Said,

    Hahaha it’s so awesome that someone blogged about this. We brought the walrus and the only reason that fascist shark won is that our walrus was a pacifist. I almost cried when the asshole at the front popped poor herbert

    Posted on July 12th, 2009 at 8:32 am

  2. teibs Said,

    I can’t believe you found this! Still, suck it, Walrus.

    Posted on July 14th, 2009 at 11:52 am

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