@ZackTeibloom It always helps to have the pass and good friends. I can’t even credit the amazing friend who did all the work, since she’s so afraid of getting caught that she asked me to delete our text message history to ensure that nothing could be traced back to her. We didn’t have much of a crashing plan, but our friend, who we’ll call “the Internet,” took it upon herself to get a wristband, do a high resolution scan, and print multiple copies of. I gotta say, it’s more impressive than any undertaking we’ve done. Crashing by yourself is hard enough, but not only did Andy and I have to crash, we had two rookie festival-goers with us for a project we’ll tell you about soon that we had to sneak in. No easy task.
We met with “The Internet” at her office where she gratefully gave us four fake wristbands that looked shockingly good. They even had the scannable barcode on them. The question became: would the wristbands scan if we used them one after another? Would they scan at all? Really only one way to find out. As we got closer to the gates, we saw other wristbands and noticed ours looked almost identical to the real thing, but were a few shades darker than the real thing. No worries. We’d just look for someone with sunglasses on. Andy decided to go first (can you blame him? If one would scan, it would be whoever went first.) We filmed him walking in and his wristband scanned and they let him right in (even though he’d already ripped it in two places and athletic taped it back together. I went next and … it didn’t scan. They sent me to a table for people whose wristbands weren’t working for whatever reason. From what I could tell, they’d have you write all your information down and then let you walk by. The beauty of this check-in was that once you wrote your info down, there was no one there to stop you when you walked around the table. Good news for me! I acted as if I’d just written all my information down and walked right by the table without looking back. This process took a total of three minutes. Unfortunately, this wasn’t the end of the crashing.
We still had to get our new festival friends in and they looked scared and overwhelmed. Andy distracted the guard, asking her if she was allowed to sneak off and see shows later and she loved the attention, telling him how she didn’t have a job last week, yadda yadda yadda, our friends started making their move. Just as our boy was sliding by with a family, his foot got caught in a baby stroller and was stuck behind a man with an over-sized backpack. These are actually perfect blockers, and once he freed his foot, he slid right by and incredulously said “I can’t believe how easy that was!” That’s what we’ve been trying to tell you. Our other friend had even less trouble and there we were. once again crashing as Blues Traveler played. Thankfully we didn’t have to try to “Run Around.”
I did have one big crashing regret. I fully intended on letting two other friends (a doctor and a Johan Sebastian ‘bach) in with a pass back as soon as they got there, but due to having horrible cell reception and the fact that our new friends were incapable of understanding how to meet up at a location, we had to delay an hour and a half and they missed the Black Keys. Sorry friends. Glad we got you in eventually.
(UPDATE) #39: On Saturday we had the wristbands all set to go, but this time none of them scanned correctly. No worries. Back to the “Issues with Tickets” line. The weakest part of any line at any festival I’ve been to. The only possible exception is the first few days of Jazz Fest, when they completely left the exit line open to walk in. Anyway, the end of this line leads to guards sitting down who think they’re just dealing with frustrated paying attendees whose bands won’t scan for whatever reason. Andy asked one of them what time it was. The guard was embarrassed she didn’t have the time, but they asked someone else who said it was 12:30. 12:30!? It’s Grace Potter time! Let us right in.