Monday, January 21, 2019

How to: Lollapalooza 2011

Posted by teibs On August - 4 - 2011

@ZackTeibloom Andy and I couldn’t be more excited to be back in Chicago for Lollapalooza this weekend. We hope to see as many friends as possible and see some shows and share a sandwich and catch up and all that jazz. Having said that, we’re gonna have to go over some things to make this as easy for all of us as possible. First off, we’re here to see music and we know what we want to see. We’ve made our schedules and we’re sticking to them. If you want to go to Eminem, talk to Andy. If you want to see Coldplay, I’m your guy. (Wow, never thought I’d say that.) And you better get to the Coldplay stage early, because I’m likely staying there from Bright Eyes on, unless I decide to make a dash for OK Go. Our schedules are below. Here’s a few things to consider and we’ll see you out there. Let’s get our festival on. 

  • I’m not answering a phone call between 2pm and 10 pm Friday to Sunday. Learn how to text and make it a good one. If you want to meet up, I’m going to ask for the following things:
  1. What show you want to meet at.
  2. Your exact location. (We call it triangulating. Pick two distinct locations that you’re equidistant from.)
  3. The time. Service will likely be delayed. Adding in the time you sent the text helps immensely.
A perfect text: “At Young the Giant. I’m even with the right speaker panel, three rows from the front. I’ve got a beer with your name on it. 1:08 p.m.” The beer isn’t necessary, but why not. If you can pull this off, the odds of us throwing up a hand so you can find us go up exponentially. If you text “where are you?” I will not respond. Give me something to work with.
If that’s not enough, I’ll be wearing a neon yellow/green tennis ball colored t-shirt that says “I Heart Fests.” You can’t miss me.
  • Yes, I am crashing Saturday and Sunday. Yes, I’m open to the idea of helping you crash. If you’re patient, or a pussy, I’m leaving you behind. If you’re game and adventurous, let’s get it on. I snuck two people in last year, because they stuck with me. Text me between 11 a.m. and noon Saturday or Sunday and I’ll keep you in the loop. Same texting rules apply.
  • We don’t do after shows. We get to the fest by noon and stay through the headliner’s encore. We’re tired, sweaty and have a lot of writing to do.
Here’s our festival preview coverage:

4 Responses

  1. Tara Said,

    I was set to go to Lolla, but I’m headed to Yarmony Grass in Colorado instead. I’m super stoked to be doing something different, but your rules of engagement should come in handy at any festie. Thanks for posting!

    Posted on August 4th, 2011 at 1:19 pm

  2. Rob Said,

    Not one of you three are going to see Cults… you should be ashamed. That is the one bright spot in an otherwise subpar lineup:

    Posted on August 4th, 2011 at 9:03 pm

  3. Yuliya Said,

    How are you going to crash? message me on Facebook asap: Yuliya Yukhvidin or email me.

    Posted on August 4th, 2011 at 10:33 pm

  4. Mitch Said,

    This is a little after the fact, but I told Andy I would comment. I read Zack’s rules for meeting up and texting and wondered how someone who could not find his car keys at a festival and had to have extra keys brought to him can be so focused on the Festival Crashers rules for these very important things. Since I was meeting Andy for breakfast on Saturday, I WAS very careful not to violate ANY of Zack’s guidelines. Hope you guys had a great time and enjoy ACL and have a great B-day Andy.

    Posted on August 11th, 2011 at 6:32 pm

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